Friday, October 30, 2009

Why I Won't Sleep Much Halloween Night

"Hey, Dad! Wanna see my pictures from art class?"

bloody pumpkin

"That's an scary looking jack-o-lantern, Thing 2. But, uh, what's with the red under the eyes and mouth?"

"That's blood! Oozing out!"

"Uh, awesome, buddy. What else ya got there? That's a big one."

"Yeah. I was the only one to do two pictures. Everyone else only did one. But I did TWO."


 witch flies by moon

"Cool looking witch silhouette in front of the moon, dude."

"Yeah. Look down there ...

 tombstone

"... That's a tombstone by the house!"

"Nice touch, son... but, um, what's that over there? ...

 scarecrow with chainsaw

"... Is that a scarecrow? With a chainsaw?"

"Yeah! He came to the life! He cut up the man in the house. That's who's under the tombstone!"

(blink)

(blink)

"So, uh ... wanna tear into the bag of AirHeads I bought for the trick-or-treaters?"

"YESSSSSSS!"

*

Happy Halloween. Be good to your trick-or-treaters. And your kids. Please.

40 comments:

  1. The only thing that makes me feel less terrified of that last photo - and I must confess it's a small thing - is the fact that there's not dripping blood or clots of hair on the teeth of that Chainsaw O' Terror the demonic scarecrow is hoisting.

    Do as the boys in Metallica suggest - sleep with one eye open.

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  2. Well, we know whose list you're on. Perhaps too much enforced reading or homework, hmmmm? Better reconsider your life insurance beneficiaries after that little piece of passive-aggressive artwork.

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  3. For a homicidal maniac wielding a chainsaw, that scarecrow looks downright chipper.

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  4. Hmmmmm. That's quite an imagination. I'm sure you have nothing to worry about. Really.

    Happy Halloween to you and yours. Don't eat too much of your kids' candy . . . LOL

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  5. I am instantly feeling better about my kids and me.

    Your like Sanka for my soul.

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  6. I can't wait for my boys to make these kinds of drawings for me.

    ...because I'm weird.

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  7. Wow, I seriously could use Thing 2 tonight in the Middle School Haunted House. He has the perfect oedipal attitude. I'll supply the chain saw.

    (Love, love, love when a kid, especially a boy, is this creative and enjoys art. How does he feel about Cambells soup?)

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  8. If you lived in my school district, they'd put Thing 2 into the gifted program immediately because here nothing proves gifted more than disturbing artwork. Angst's kindergarten renderings of aliens taking over Earth got him in.

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  9. Might wanna lock your bedroom door. Perhaps put the dresser in front too. Good luck.

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  10. Make it into a little book and have him write words to it :-)

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  11. I wouldn't go giving sugar to minds like that!

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  12. I'm going to have nightmares about that last one. NIGHTMARES!

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  13. That's a highly elaborate scheme to get his hands on some early Halloween candy.

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  14. I think the boy deserves something more than air heads. C'mon...maybe some gummy eyeballs or something.

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  15. Okay, so your boy has bought into the Puritans, Christian right version of all things terrible and? You are still uncool and therefore untouchable by such forces (unless you eat all the Halloween candy before the night is out).

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  16. Awww, so cute! That was a great post! Happy Halloween.

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  17. Nobody told me there were scarecrows with chainsaws!

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  18. Hey just be glad your kid has an imagination and didn't draw those pics after seeing Paranormal Activity.

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  19. Oh my ... that's super frightening!!! I wouldn't be sleeping either!

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  20. I totally hear thing two proudly telling you this story, lol

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  21. Kids. Can't drug 'em, only cute when they sleep sometimes.
    :)
    BOO!

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  22. I can only imagine what the next Parent-Teacher conference will be like.

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  23. that is some fantastic imagination! - get that lad in art school :-)

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  24. Haha, they come out with some funny stuff sometimes! Got to give it to them - they have imagination!!

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  25. That is pretty awesome, but I'm really glad he's yours! ; )

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  26. A great artist at such a young age. You must be so proud (& just a little freaked out...LOL)

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  27. It's like a little window into his psyche. A terrifying little window.

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  28. Those are awesome. I especially like the scarecrow, though I'm a sucker for anything with a chainsaw. Clearly, the man in the house was a crappy neighbor.

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  29. Yikes. YOU'RE the one who better be good. Also, watch your back.

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  30. It's November 5th...... and no new posts. Did you run out of AirHeads? (Bzzzzzz)

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  31. But what's the backstory? Did the guy deserve it? Did he accidentally bring the scarecrow to life and it turned on him? We want to know.

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  32. Gr8 kids!

    I especially love the guy with the chainsaw...


    Aloha, Uncool Friend!


    Comfort Spiral

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  33. and were those pictures prophetic?

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  34. HOLY SHIT!!!

    DAYUM!!

    OK then, um, yes, give the boy candy!!

    GAAH!!

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  35. No wonder my scarecrow doesn't scare the crows! No chainsaw.

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  36. I'm surprised that I feel like the pumpkin with bleeding eyes is more disturbing than the scenario of the homicidal scarecrow. But that's what Halloween's all about, right? Scaring the hell out of people!

    I haven't been reading pretty much anyone's blog in way too long, so I might have missed tip as to what's going on-- why so long since you posted here?

    Did that chimpanzee come back to Connecticut on Halloween to rip off some more faces, like Michael Myers??

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  37. See, I was never allowed to watch horror movies or anything, so I could never have come up with anything this cool as a kid.

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  38. He's got talent and game. Major game.

    Comment approval? What's up? Spam maCHines got ya?

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