Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Just Desserts

Every Wednesday night at 8 o’clock, the Uncool Family huddles together in front of our wondrous 46-inch flatscreen to watch our favorite family show, The Middle.

the middle cast ABC family comedy

While My Love and I find most episodes of Modern Family to be gut-bustingly funny (especially the Valentine’s Day ones in which parents Phil and Claire attempt to rekindle the passion with some failed role playingtwice), it’s a little too adult for The Things. The chronicles of the chronically underachieving Hecks of Orson, Indiana; however, usually generates several good laughs without the need for me to explain the innuendos, double entendres and why Daddy drools every time SofĂ­a Vergara bobbles by the camera.

(I also have a thing for Julie Bowen dating back to her character on NBC’s late, great bowling-alley-lawyer show, Ed, but she doesn’t cause the same involuntary reflexive in my salivary glands.)

(Or in my groin.)

The Middle, however, provides much simpler, cleaner teachable moments. For example:

We were laughing along at a repeat episode recently in which the mother, Frankie, throws out her back and is lying flat on the floor. There’s some battle of the sexes subplot going on so she can’t tell her husband she’s hurt herself and when he enters the room, she pretends she looking for a button.

The husband, Mike, announces that he just remembered that it’s their anniversary, so she should “throw on some heels” and he’ll take her to dinner.

“I’ll even let you order what you want and I will have something of equal or lesser value!” Then he adds slyly, “Maybe we’ll even head home for a little dessert.”

Frankie thinks (via voiceover) while squirming on the carpet in an attempt to hide her pain: Oh, God -- I hope he’s taking about ice cream.

Thing 2’s eyes widen.

The boy practically leaps off the couch and yells: “Maybe he’s taking about CAKE!!”

“No, son,” I reply, “I believe he’s talking about pie. Definitely,  pie.”

Thing 2 looks deflated and adds a simple, tongue extending: “Bleech!”

Someday his taste in sweets will change but, as I prove quite regularly, they never get any more sophisticated.


  1. Pie. Definitely pie, American at that. :)

  2. Well, I always say "you are what you eat."

  3. Pie is where its at. Yep, pie it is.

  4. Julie Bowen does nothing for me.

    Sofia Vergara...yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

  5. That is just funny.
    Pie. Hahaha

  6. Someday, he'll remember that moment and his jaw wil fall off.

  7. As long as it's topped with whipped cream......

  8. Cake or Pie that is.

    You knew that's what I meant. Right?

  9. I was gonna make the American Pie comment but Julianna already made it...

  10. I was always more of a Julie Bowen in Happy Gilmore kind of guy...

    It's awesome that Thing 2 got so excited that MAYBE it was cake. I miss being like that.

  11. Good one, Uncool One. And heck, I drool over Sofia's body and accent myself.

  12. Kids are worth it because of these moments. Only barely because of the crap diapers and back talk and good God the friggin' activities. But still, worth it.

    Pie. Teehee.

  13. Yeah... I enjoy The Middle for THAT exact reason! The kids enjoy it...and I get some innuendo laughs!

  14. What IS it with Carol Vessey? I swear, my husband would climb over me, my two small children and six Mack trucks to get at her.

  15. We just discovered this show, and yup, much more family watchable than Modern Family. Except my kids now imitate Axel...endlessly... I'm always glad when Wednesday rolls around bc the kids have exhausted all the one-liners from last week's episode and I can't manage to laugh at them anymore.

  16. Thanks for the laugh.
    I remember watching shows with my kids and having moments like that and trying not to laugh at them.

  17. Definitely pie! It's good as a pie! You'll never be wrong with a pie. Thanks for the laugh! Really need one right now. :)


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My Uncool Past