Thursday, November 13, 2008

When Love Walks in the Room

His older sister invited him to a Friday-the-13th/birthday party for a mutual friend. The last party he attended with his sister was eight years earlier in high school. That bash ended with him in a doorway, swapping DNA samples with a future lesbian.

Yet he was ambivalent and depressed. He was 24 and still living with his parents. His job sucked ... and it was only part-time.

He relented. Maybe this would break the funk. Moreover, there was certain to be a keg.

A few hours later, he walked into their friends' house. Immediately he approached an athletic-looking woman with long curly hair wearing black stretch pants. He had his weaknesses.

She said she was from Nebraska.

"I've never met anyone from Nebraska before," he said.

The remaining conversation is lost, but he remembers disengaging from it when another partygoer, who looked suspiciously like his brother-in-law, started horning in on the action.

He meandered into the kitchen, and started catching up with some refugees from a past life. Among the group stood one person he didn't know.

She said she was from Nebraska.

"That's funny," he said. "You're only the second person I've ever met from Nebraska, and I met the first one a few minutes ago in the other room."

She laughed. "Next, I suppose, you'll tell me I'm only the second blonde you've ever met."

Her eyes were blue. Her skirt was short. The beer was Heineken.

Several hours of witty banter later, his sister interrupted and asked if he was ready to go home.

"I guess I'll go with you," he slurred matter-of-factly, "unless she wants to give me a ride home."

To his surprise, she said she would. Little did she know that his sister lived just three houses from him.

They drove to his house in her duct-taped burgundy Toyota Camary.

"I'd invite you in," he said as they sat there in the driveway's November darkness, "but I live with my parents."

"That's OK," she said.

Once inside, he offered to make her a cup of tea.

He handed her the steaming mug and a half-filled carton of milk. Without unfolding the cardboard spout, she tipped the carton on its side. A thin stream of milk shot out of the slit and into her cup.

"I don't know about Nebraska," he said, "but out here, we usually open the carton, then pour."

It was then, legend has it, that they knew that they we're perfect for each other.

Happy 16 years together, My Love. Earl Grey?



Video: "Message of Love," The Pretenders

Am I funny "strange" or funny "ha ha"? Tell them which at Humor-Blogs.com.

35 comments:

  1. Happy Anniversary! Dang, this must be a popular month for blogger love. Is it because it's cold?

    I love the melting pumpkin too:).

    ReplyDelete
  2. Happy anniversary, and congratulations on picking a winner.

    Incidentally, in seeing your picture up in the corner, I have to wonder how you got the squirrels to eat it from the bottom up. That's so much cooler and more imaginative than the ol' top-down approach.

    ReplyDelete
  3. More than one relationship has started with a drunken - er, chance - encounter at a party with a resident of Nebraska. Congrats on yours.

    Was "Some Enchanted Evening" playing in the background?

    Happy anniversary!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happy Anniversary to the Uncools! May you have at least 100 more!

    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  5. This is better than 100 Hallmark cards signed lovingly with just your name, which I'm not saying I've ever gotten. Signed by my husband and not you. And not 100. Yet.

    Happy anniversary. This is proof that Midwest girls have it going on.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Happy Anniversary!!

    The Pretenders were my first favorite band and Chrissie Hynde was my first ever crush. Mmmm.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Cute story. Happy anniversary, kids! Cheers to many more years of health and happiness.

    ReplyDelete
  8. romantic story :)

    Melting pumpkin is a nice touch.

    ReplyDelete
  9. awe.. what a great post! best 'how we met' story i've heard in a while. Happy Anniversary!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Happy Anniversary.
    I love "how we met" stories. Some, like yours are very sweet and funny.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sigh. That was a nice post. Happy Anniversary!

    ReplyDelete
  12. 16 years...nice.

    Happy Anniversary, you crazy Kids.

    And, i reckon it will be. Now that you're back on the Meat and Beer.

    Watch out though. If I'm not mistaken, year 16 is the Wheatgrass/Tofu Anniversary.

    ReplyDelete
  13. and I thought in Nebraska they just tipped the cows for milk.

    who woulda thunk it?

    Happy Anniversary!

    ReplyDelete
  14. CIII - Anything but [bleeping] herbal [cuckoo] frickin' tea! Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  15. awww...how sweet.

    the melting pumpkin...that's just gross. i bet it smells great too!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Awwww! What a cute story! Happy Anniversary!

    The first time I met my future hubs, he was wearing a trenchcoat, had just shaved his head and was walking into the fast food place I worked for an interview.

    I asked, "Are you a skinhead? Because if you are I'm gonna beat the crap outta you!"

    He wasn't but and then we somehow ended up getting married.

    ReplyDelete
  17. am presuming that afterward cigarettes were smoked and philosophy exchanged. in French.

    congratulations, you child groom you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. many years ago i was eating some nacho cheese doritos with a male friend. it was down to the crumbs. without thinking, i slightly opened the bag, tilted my head back and slid the crumbs in my mouth. without missing a beat my friend said, "if i was dating a girl and she did that, i think i'd have to marry her."

    see, woman have all these criteria they're looking for in a man. this boy just wanted a girl who could eat the last of the dorito crumbs without getting any on her.

    ReplyDelete
  19. What a great story. Was this here in town?

    ReplyDelete
  20. I'm so glad I found your blog. What a great storyteller you are (of course, it helps to have a good story to tell in the first place.)

    I'm glad you found each other. Obviously she saw something in your slur-voiced self that shone through.

    I wish you many more happy times together. I'll definitely be back to read your writing again.

    Best, -MM

    ReplyDelete
  21. Happy anniversary! Yay for beer and short skirts!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Happy anniversary! Those short skirts ALWAYS work...

    ReplyDelete
  23. All the best to you and your better half.

    Considering what a good guy you are, she must be amazing.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Wow. You must have some wicked moves. You got the chick while you still lived with the 'rents. it was true love. Happy Anniversary!

    Also, can I just tell you that I breathed a huge sigh of relief when the video at the bottom was NOT Van Halen's Love Comes Walking In. I mean, I've lurked you and liked you, but no one plays a Van Halen video and doesn't get whipped for it.

    ReplyDelete
  25. That's just beautiful. Happy anniversary to you and your wife!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Happy anniversary! I hope you have many many more!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Happy Anniversary!

    Who was watching Nebraska if they were all at the party?

    ReplyDelete
  28. that was a lovely, lovely story! Happy anniversary.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Happy Anniversary! Nebraska rocks.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Nice post -- happy anniversary!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Thus proving there is no possible way to withstand the sensual onslaught that is Nebraska.

    Happy "Do you want to come in for a cup of tea"-iversary to you both...

    ReplyDelete
  32. Happy, happy.

    We're at 12 1/2.

    And also, old. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete

HEY, YOU! DOWN HERE! READ THIS!!

I try to reply to all comments. To receive a reply email, make sure the comment ID you use contains your email address AND click the "Subscribe by email" link before you publish your comment.

Otherwise, you'll need to check back here for my reply.

REMEMBER: You're at your sexiest when you comment.

My Uncool Past

ShareThis