Thursday, September 4, 2008

Not About Sarah Palin. Sorta.

While rest of the media -- professional, amateur and Fox News -- is buzzing about Sarah Palin today, I'm talking football over on, so please go over there and read my post.

OK, even that post alludes to Sarah Palin. How could it not? They must love football in Alaska as much as they love moose, oil and unprotected teen sex. Hmmm, I bet they combine all four in one sitting up there. Alaska -- your 49th in the union but No. 1 in awesome perversness.

My Love has been obsessed with Palin being nominated as VP. Obsessed because I think she thinks she is just as qualified for the nomination, assuming My Love was a Republican and was backed by a vital special interest group, such as Wives of DUI Snowmobile Champions. Hey, My Love's dad was mayor of a small Midwestern town of less than 8,000. Executive knowledge through osmosis, baby. That's how George W. made it in, right?

Well, after watching Sarah Palin's speech last night, I must say I admire her fire, her spirit and her sarcastic wit (or that of her speechwriter). So much so that I dreamed about her last night. I'll save the details for my shrink; however, one thing stuck in my craw last night about this whole affair (no, she's not having an affair with me, let's stop the talk right here):

She isn't afraid to use her Down Syndrome baby like a prop.

Her daughter, the knocked up one, used the boy to hide her now apparent baby bump during Palin's introduction speech last week. Cindy McCain played down her heiress background and Rudy G.'s hard-assness by cuddling the kid during the former NYC mayor's speech. Someone woke the kid up on stage so Palin could be photographed with him after saying she'd be an advocate for special needs kids.

Sarah, darling, next time hire a sitter. No one will think less of you. You have my e-mail. Pay is negotiable.

Don't forget -- read my other post at or at least go to and vote for me because I will never raise your taxes or impregnate your unwed daughter!


  1. You know what I love about human beings?

    Their ability to watch the same show and have TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT perceptions about it.

    I'm heading over to read your post.

  2. So far she's thrown 3 of her five kids into the fray. Watch out Willow and Piper- Momma's a'comin'.

  3. okay, because I don't want to appear bitchy and catty, let's just talk about the dream. Were either of you naked?

  4. If she keeps bringing those kids around then as props then she shouldn't mind if the Dems start taking pot shots at them.

    Might as well since the Republicans are already complaining about it.

  5. Mama - Hmm. What did you see? I'm intrigued.

    Whit - I'd be dropping logs if I was them right now.

    Vodka - We were in the dean's office of my college. Bush was the outgoing dean. I was helping him pack. Sarah came in. She complained of being cold, yet she was sweaty, the back of her shirt was stained from it. I headed back to my dorm and found my old winter parka lying in a hallway even though it was quite warm outside. I walked to Roy Rogers and ordered a 4-piece combo and a chocolate shake.

    B.E. - Exactly. At the GOPers were chanting, "Drill, baby, drill!"

  6. Great post! I am right there with you...and am trying to picture the whole football, moose, sex and oil thing.

    I am sure that she will continue to use her she does not seem to know what else to do.

  7. Seriously. I haven't seen Nepotism this blatant since the Spellings.

  8. ugh. I'm so tired of politics. Can't wait for November to get here already.

  9. Everyone keeps saying that children should be left out of politics - and I agree! But I also thinks that means that kids should stay home or in hotel rooms with sitters and not be paraded around on stage for all the world to see! They are young and innocent and there's no need for them to be involved in the politics their parents are choosing to be involved in!

    Just my two cents on it all!

  10. I think we should have some pity for Sarah Palin. She's gonna be a grandma at the age of 44!

  11. Well, whew! I'm glad to hear 18-year-old-Daughter is safe.

  12. Minus the dream part, I watched the same show you did last night, and thought pretty much the same thing.

    The only reason I didn't dream about her is I don't get that worked up about the hot girl-on-girl thing

  13. Funny stuff you got there. I agree with Mama on perception as I went reading some rightie stuff just to figure out their stand - oh my!

  14. I would totally vote for your lady, totally. After 8 years of Homer Simpson running the country and now this, by the next election my booger-eating sons should be eligible to run.

  15. I wrote a post about Mama Palin. and I am chicken to post it. Not too chicken to leave it HERE in your comments however. Here goes:

    "I am about to talk POLITICS. Come to think of it- any of my readers who are really really into politics-should maybe stop reading now as well. If you do not, you will soon be infuriated by my lack of interest, knowledge and savvy when it comes to all things regarding this upcoming election.

    I am not political. I am really sorta ANTI-political, if there is such a thing. I know, I know....politics effects us all and we should care about one side or the other yada, yada, yada.....but I don't. The whole spectacle just frustrates me. So I just try to IGNORE it. (do you hate me yet?). I do vote. I research at the last minute and make a decision. So I vote. That is good right?

    BUT. I. HAVE.TO. COMMENT on Mccain's VP choice. Because sometimes I have no control over this blog and my typing hands....I MUST. I like to say the things I think people might be THINKING....but are afraid to say outloud lest they offend others. I guess I am a natural offender.

    First, the whole 'joke' about hockey moms and bulldogs was offensive. To both sport moms and well, bulldogs. Just exactly whose vote is she trying to get?

    She has a 4 month old BABY. Um, a baby with special needs (Down Syndrome) no less. I am pretty damn sure when my kids were 4 months old I was in no position to be running a country. Heck when they were 4 months old I could barely get a shower everyday. And they were still feeding in the middle of the night-so spent most days in a zombie like state until nap time. When I may or may not have passed out on the floor next to the baby's crib daily. Okay (you being those who support his choice) might say- oh but she will have HELP if elected. White House nannies I guess. (do they have those? and if they do, do they wear those secret service ear pieces?)......SO she is gonna let someone else help raise her kid I guess. Along with her fishing snowmobiling husband. Not exactly the kind of mom the kid was probably hoping to get. Some mom's HAVE to work. But does SHE? We criticise celebrities FREELY about their nannies and ability to spend so much time away from their children. How they go back to work immediately-even if they obviously don't need the income. Um, how then is this any different? How can I be expected to think her choices AS A MOTHER are a good reflection on HER CHOICES as A VP of A COUNTRY?

    And what is with having a baby at 44? By choice? She had to know the increase % in complications and possibility for special needs to the child. Oh wait- perhaps an accident surprise? Do they not HAVE birth control in her 'small town'? Perhaps that is the same cause of her 17 year old daughter's pregnancy as well. Like mother, like daughter? But most shocking to me, was the fact that her 19 year old son has enlisted to the military. I think the men and women fighting for our country are...I say without hesitation...absolute HEROS....BUT would I encourage my son to join in the middle of a WAR? I am praying this was not a ploy to help the campaign. And I am praying he (along with all the other CHILDREN in Iraq) come home safe.

    I am all about women doing all the jobs that men can do blah, blah, blah. But not at the expense of their CHILDREN. Sure you can DO it ALL. But NOT all at the SAME TIME. And if you try to do it all at the same time...something WILL SUFFER.

    So as you can see I know next to nothing when it comes to politics. I know McCain has a better deal on taxes for me. And I know Obama has a pencil mustache that is really obvious on a 60" plasma screen TV but his wife seems pretty together. Oh that and his catch phrase is CHANGE. Which as it sits right now- no matter which side wins...there is gonna be plenty of change in the white house. PLEN.TY. Including and not limited to the possibility of DIAPERS. And I am not talking about McCain this time."

    I am so annoying. I annoy myself.

  16. She's every woman my chaffed butt!

    She's using her children, plain and simple. And I can't respect that.

  17. Tent - How can I use the Things to gain power in the Western world. I wonder ...

    Ciii - During the family shots, I was expecting a lesser Baldwin to pop his head in any minute.

    Wendy - Admit it. You just are jonsesing for cranberry sauce.

    Amy - And to show how progressive she is, she should hire an black male nanny. Let's see her explain that one to the people, huh?

    Nikki - You're back! And now I'm imagining SP in granny panties. Still works. Nope. Wait ... maybe not.

    MAW - No Palin is safe. Damn pundits!

    FADKOG - Dream is describe above. No ugly bumping at all. Do you still love me?

    Psuedo - C'mon, stop stealing Mama's outrage.

    Shonda - At least Homer would have made us laugh with his Duff-induced antics.

    Marcy - I don't know about the rest of my readers, but I will not mess with you. Ever. But SP insulted pitbulls. Talk about kicking a species when it's down.

    Aandi - Welcome. I think I am going to so like having you around.

  18. If you figure out how to use the Things for your advantage, can you share your knowledge? I am all about pimping out my L's. If Ms. Palin can do it, I can too. After all, she is "just like us" right? Oh, except for the fact that I have spent the last 14 years as a teen sexual health educator and completely disagree with just about everything Ms. Palin stands for. Great post!

  19. I thought it was mightily amusing how Cindy McCain tried so hard to act like she could relate to Sarah Palin's working class anecdotes. The shots they had of her holding the baby were priceless. She looked more uncomfortable than Newt Gingrich in a gay bar. I think that poor kid was so passed out because his corneas were seared by the hideous shade of green that was Cindy's dress.

    Um, I'm a feminist by the way. So I should have written something insightful about the historic nature of the moment and all that, but damn! I was too blinded by the dress.

    Still don't think I'm sold on Palin's credentials, but I have to say, I'd love to go drinking with her sometime.

  20. I think it's sick that she (and was it really her or the 'machine') that used the kid as a prop.

    I'd rather watch an episode of Corey in the House than any more of this

    Politics is a verb not a noun.

  21. I think it's a testament to the progress of the women's right movement that I can complain about this lady's politics, personal choices, and lack of experience without being called sexist...

    I will maintain my joy at this deluded belief by not actually expressing my views, so I can't become even more horribly jaded at the reaction, based on what I've seen so far.

    I'm starting to feel physically ill these past few weeks watching/reading/thinking about this campaign, which was supposed to be so much more inspiring and classy than those of the past few decades. I used to respect John McCain, but unfortunately he's made some binding deals with the same people (who wrote Palin's speech without having yet met her) that Bush did, and Obama's people learned from Kerry and Gore that they have to be willing to get down in the mud when dragged there.

    Just sad.

    Sorry to be a huge downer-- I liked your post :-)

  22. brilliant.

    and also: The Love for President!

  23. Great post!
    Love the picture too!
    Sorry, I couldn't think of anything funny to say. : (

  24. HA! I love that you said what I wanted to about her baby, but wasn't sure if it would be going to it. Nothin' like making your own kids be the sacrificial lamb, eh?

  25. I just don't get how Sarah Palin is considered hot in any way shape or form. I guess I just see through that veneer. And as the parent of a kid with Down syndrome I'm offended and appalled by her. "Advocate" my ass.

  26. That picture rules.
    I love her husband--the prop manager. I hope a sex scandal gets unearthed soon, and that it somehow involves a moose.

  27. I also found her comment about being an advocate in the white house for parents of children with special needs. How will she help them? By continuing to underfund and punish our education system that provides the actual care for these children every day? That'll be nice.

  28. football moose sex? This sounds intriguing!

  29. I personally liked when the one daughter licked her hand and smoothed the baby's hair down.


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