Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy Frickin' Father's Day!

The last thing anyone should think is that I'm a perfect father. As proof, I offer this:

I don't recall what I did to prompt my son into making this a few weeks ago but it must have been pretty rotten because he actually presented to me without hesitation.

Did I take his Nintendo DS away?

Make him finally change out of his pajamas on a weekend?

Force him to eat a vegetable?

Eh. Another rite of passage down. Now I feel like I'm getting somewhere in this crazy job.

Beside it was only one sign. I still have one of these:

And TWO of these:

Good me: 3. Bad me: 1. Do I try to run out the clock now?

Here are a couple of Father's Day reads for you:

My fellow dads at and I each wrote up one memory of our fathers and put them into a single post on Friday. It is really an amazing little collection of work, in terms of the writing and the memories themselves, that you should like.

Over at HotDads, I posted the most recent newspaper column I wrote about the plight of being an American dad these day. It's OK, but what is better is the e-mail response MY DAD sent me about it.

And watch on Tuesday for a special guest post from My Love. Really. All by herself.

Happy Father's Day to all. I'm getting a beer.


  1. Yeah, spike it and call it a game.

    Grab one for me, will ya?

    Happy Father's Day!

  2. Just wait till your kids start dissing you on Facebook - or Twitter - or whatever is the hot app of the day when they are teenagers. Yes, not only you, but your friends will know your kids are mad at you!

    There's no way to know the score because they only post when they're mad - never when there's something nice to say ;-)

  3. Oh, and happy Father's Day and I'm glad your kids aren't teenagers yet. Because you'll need a *spa day* away in order not to strangle them....

  4. Thanks ok...

    I found a mug labeled Poison for Mom under my youngest bed when he was about 5 years old :-)

  5. It's the true parenting diploma. I hate you (insert mom or dad here) note. Congrats on doing something so crappy that you earned your reward.

    Now give the kid back his Nintendo DS and upgrade to scotch.

  6. that note is EVIDENCE that you are a great dad.

    frame it.

  7. Oh that note right there says it all - you are indeed the worst dad ever, however it is the worst dad/mom/teacher ever that earns the highest regards when the children grow up and know more. That is the hard part of parenting - it is a long term result process. It has only a little instant gratification.

  8. I read that as "I hated ad". And there are many ads that I've hated that are absolutely no reflection on my father.

    Have a great day tomorrow.

  9. Awww ... how sad about the sign. But ... kids hate everything at some point or another. So like the weather in Florida, wait five minutes. I'm sure it's all water under the bridge now anyway. Enough platitudes for ya? Good, cause I'm fresh out of anymore.

    Blessings and do TRY to have a Happy Father's day!

  10. I'm going with Marinka's interpretation-- he's trying to give you a critique of a commercial he saw.

    The kid could have a future in advertising!

  11. I am going with, this makes you a great Dad cause you do whats right not what is easy. Oh what can I say about it? I have NO idea, happy Father's day.

  12. I second Vodka Mom's interpretation.

    And as a positive, his spelling is accurate.

  13. You are not only a great dad to your kids, but also a great "dad" to those of us "son" and "daughter" bloggers of yours. Hope you don't mind if we return home one day to stay. ;)

    unfinishedrambling (at) gmail (dot) com because I always want a personal "witty" retort from my "dad"

  14. OH MY GOSH... I have NONE of those things.

    No right of passage...


    I'm going to have to start taking notes or something...

  15. I have a collection of those - na-nonnie-na-na! The notes get longer as they learn to write more than those three little words. I'm with Pop and Ice - save now for your spa day!

  16. MMMMMM beer. I could use one right now.

  17. Loved the post. However, if you continue to keep track of the good dad, bad dad points your going to drive yourself crazy (or more crazy)....

  18. Alternately, it might say "I hat edad." I is the Roman numeral for one, and edad is Spanish for age, so maybe he's telling you in Spanish and Ancient Roman that his hat is one year old. Sounds like you've got a prodigy!

  19. Forgive my delay in getting over here and wishing you a happy Father's Day. I hope it was wonderful. You must be doing something right if you've got TWO 'greatest dad' hats. That trumps a Wacker Club hat any day of the month!

  20. Just back from your hometown.

    The car ride home? Which was without The Kid (who was have meetings in NYC) -- it was ugly.


  21. To Your Love:

    Well done on the Guest Blog @ DadCentric.

  22. Hmph, still waiting for my "greatest Mom" mug. It's not true until it's printed on a mug!

  23. AH&U -

    I know that "Camp Dad/Mom" has started and the little mons -ooops- darlings are running amuck 24/7, jacked-up on Kool Aid and strung out on Sno Cones. However, please do not use this as a reason to go on vacation from (abandon) entertaining your loyal (desperate) readers. Some of us (me) may consider this blog the one link to sanity as we (okay, "we" need therapy) stand together, facing Summer like Bowie and Crockett did at the Alamo.

    Oooops, the Dahlings are making lemonade and I just heard a crash. Gotta go as soon as I untie myself from their last project.

    Have a good one. And seriously, keep writing for your non-paying audience.

  24. My sister got her first “I do’t love mommy” sign earlier this year. My niece, 5 years old at that time, had taped it to the wall of their living room for everybody to see. When my sister called niece to ask he what was up with that, her response was “Oh wait, I made a mistake” and then stood on tippytoes to added a capital “N” in between the “o” and the apostrophe.

    I love that kid!

    Also, I hope you had a great father’s day!

  25. Happy Belated Father's Day. I would walk away while you're up. I suspect that the older they get, the more I Hate Dad's you're going to get.

  26. I'm so glad my girls can't spell yet.

  27. thank god i don't have kids yet. i couldn't handle that. hand in there man!
    Father's day is like 5 months away.. start being nice and dropping gift hints now.

  28. do you know where i can purchase that mug? I've been looking all over and can't seem to find it

    1. Sorry, I don't. The boy got it for me at a school gift sale.

  29. do you know where i can find this mug, i have been looking all over and can't find it.


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