Friday, April 23, 2010

My Meaty Weiners ... I Mean -- Winners

Sure, you love me, your humble scribe and beleaguered at-home dad, but I know where your true affections lie.

hillshire farm go meat logoThey lie on the grill.

And in the oven.

Maybe even in a crusty cast-iron frying pan, smothered in sauteed onions, peppers and artery-clogging yumminess.

Yes, my friends, you love your Hillshire Farm meat.

And you love it free.

For one whole year.

In all, you submitted more than 240 entries into my "Win the Sausage!" giveaway, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity (assuming you didn't enter a similar once-in-a-lifetime affair elsewhere in the blogosphere) sponsored by the generous, intelligent and totally smoking hot folks at Hillshire Farm.

And I have sorted through them all and come up with this ...

First, some surprise "bonus" prizes so I can:
  • better comply with FCC regulations,
  • avoid problems with the IRS, and
  • hide the evidence of any possible sausage abuse from my doctor.
Runner-up prize No. 1: A copy of The Hillshire Farm Cookbook
This 64-page, full-color paperback includes a whopping 42 meaty recipes featuring Hillshire Farm products as well as tips on cooking, grilling and entertaining. And, it goes to an entrant -- chosen at random -- who happens to be named ...

James (aka Seattle Dad), author of the "Luke, I am Your Father" blog

Runner-up prize No. 2: An official "Go Meat!" white apron

This must-have article of cooking attire is being awarded to the person I believed submitted the most logical, literate and honest rationale (in the form of a naughty limerick to boot!) for her winning the grand prize. Here's her entry:

There once was a woman from Weaselville
She had very sore knees due to ... (cleaning well)
A year's worth of meat
Would keep her off of her feet
And focus her efforts in pleasureville.

The apron and congratulations go to WeaselMomma!

GRAND PRIZE: A year's supply of Hillshire Farm Product(s)

The winner, chosen at random, is a Midwestern man with
  • a heart of gold (soon to be replaced with saturated fats) ...
  • a unibrow of steel wool, and ..
  • The Cheek of God on WordPress. 
It's ...
Brian from Cheek of God
 Brian (aka TysDaddy)

Congratulations to all my winners and thanks to all of you for entering, commenting, tweeting and making not-so-thinly-veiled penis jokes. I hope the many of you who entered but are not regular readers at Always Home and Uncool will come back even when I'm not offering free animal products. Special thanks to the folks at Hillshire Farms for providing the goods.


  1. Congratulations to the soon to be cholesterol riddled unibrowed winner! Hey, I didn't really want all that meat anyway. My world is pretty full of wieners as it is and there's only so much one woman can handle.

  2. Congrats to all the winners. I am eternally jealous.

  3. Um . . . WHAT?!


    I found out about my glorious victory thanks to Cheryl, the first commenter, after she swung by and left a comment on my blog. (If I'd have known company was coming, I'd have spruced up the place!!)

    Thanks, Kevin, to you and fine folks at Hillshire. My wife, my four children, and of course, yours truly, are very grateful.

    Does Hillshire Farms make cube steaks? If so, then I know what's for dinner!!

  4. Congrats to all.

    Let me know when to show up for the BBQ!!!

  5. Sausage abuse- now there is an image that I prefer not to have. ;)

  6. Maybe your son can whip him up a few pair of 'leg bands' so he's never too far from his weinie(s)!

  7. look at YOU, media mogul!

    Aloha from Waikiki

    Comfort Spiral

  8. This contest was TOTALLY rigged... I mean TWO daddy bloggers won???


    I better head over to TysDaddy's place and remind him to share his wealth since he totally won this because you guys are like BFF's...not to mention Seattle Dad... pfft!

    I sniff scandal.

    Hey Hillshire...if you read this... I'll give away your precious sausage and not rig the contest! ;)

    Just kidding know I heart yoU! :)

    Congrats winners or should I say weiners??? ;)

  9. I have a 3 and 2 year old. I'm never gonna be sexy again.

    Just found you through Travelbug Mom. You are a hoot. Glad to be following.


REMEMBER: You're at your sexiest when you comment.


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